Flack: Ryanair look forward to receiving keys

The shy and retiring folks at the Ryanair press office are demanding the worldly possessions of Telegraph hack Bryony Gordon.

Her crime? Last week she bet her 'flat and its contents' that 'nobody has ever said the words "Ryanair", "marvellous" and "service" in the same sentence'. The self-styled 'world's favourite airline' pointed to glowing praise on its website and comms head Stephen McNamara said he was now 'looking forward to receiving the keys'. A worried Gordon said: 'Nobody tell Ryanair where I live' ...

Bell Pottinger's garrulous public affairs chief Peter Bingle has offered colleagues the chance to join him at the Fat Duck if they can predict the outcome of the general election. His generosity is not, however, unbounded. 'If there is more than one winner, we will be going to Nando's,' he warned ...

More election-themed wackiness from The SPA Way, which has come up with packets of crisps labelled 'The Real Election politi-crisps', themed after the three main political leaders. Salivating punters are offered a choice of sea salt, sea salt or, er, sea salt. Who said there was no choice in British politics anymore ...

Finally, an award to Cirkle for the most self-congratulatory press release. Announcing the promotion of Anne Kendall to MD, agency boss Caroline Kinsey said: 'She has been hugely instrumental in making Cirkle the phenomenal success it is today, including our stunning client portfolio and best-in-class, award-winning PR campaigns.'

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