Media Bitch

As his chaotic presentation unfolded, he routinely poked fun at the sponsors... until the largerthanlife figure of the Evening Standard’sMike Anderson loomed on the stage. Afterwards Lucas told the audience: “I didn’t have any banter with him. He’s the MD of the Standard... I'm not fucking stupid.”

MediaCom wins fantasy football

After an all-conquering year in the billings league, MediaCom has guaranteed itself the privilege of pissing off the entire media industry – by winning the viciously fought-over Telegraph Fantasy Football super league.

Spare a thought for AIA, who spent four months at the top of the table, only to be pipped for the lead.

Maybe MediaCom will now be giving the others a chance when it comes to new business, given the man hours they have clearly put in to become champs.

ZO studs get nod

The Hallmark Channel certainly knows how to make its mark.

Recently, EMEA director of sales Mark Taylor went on the road supported by his very own troupe of chorus girls.

“That’s the best presentation I’ve seen in 14 years,” claimed Marc Bignall, joint MD of Opera – Omnicom’s theatrically named buying shed – after seeing the show.

Well sorry Mark, in terms of buying clout you may be the equivalent of a charging rhino with dynamite strapped to your pants, but the girls themselves had other thoughts.

Apparently, it was the boys at ZenithOptimedia who most caught their eye. Do the ZO crew give better ROI perhaps?

Clark’s joke book is empty

Bitch was privileged to watch the sleekest character in media hit a slight bump at the launch of the latest MediaDNA research.

The urbane Ian Clark, director of advertising for News Group Newspapers, was moments into his high-tech presentation when it vanished from the screen only to be replaced by an error message.

“That’s not what I wanted to see at this stage... oh bollocks,” he told his audience. The pressure was really on when the IT man warned him that fixing it was going to take time. “You keep them entertained,” he suggested.

While Bitch was looking forward to a few jokes, Clark spotted potential salvation in the form of Sky sales boss Mark Chippendale. “You've got a good singing voice,” he pleaded. But this was one Chippendale who was not going to perform.

THE TWO-MINUTE TEST

Set by Ashley Bolt, account manager at Total Media

1 Between the first quarter of 1999 and the fourth of 2003, by what percentage has listening hours increased for housewives on radio?

a) 7.1% b) 10.6% c) 31.7%

2 According to MMS, which supermarket chain spent the most on advertising in 2003?

a) Asda b) Sainsbury’s c) Tescos

3 In Matt Beaumont’s book, e, what was the haphazard ad agency pitching for Coca-Cola called?

a) NOBBS b) Ward, Hooker, Wikler, Gilbert & Lambert c) Miller Shanks

4 How many episodes of Friends have there been in the past 10 years?

a) 236 b) 258 c) 263

5 What is the name of the hop-on hop-off buses that will soon be leaving London Streets?

a) Red Rangers b) Routemasters c) Regal Reds

ANSWERS

1)c, 2) b, 3)c, 4)a, 5)b

This article was first published on Media Week