Diary: Hillary’s NY state of mind gets numbed by Captain Jack

Nobody expected much from Hillary Clinton’s formal announcement of her Senate candidacy. Indeed, members of the media had been prepped to expect an event with all the spontaneity of a dental checkup.

Nobody expected much from Hillary Clinton’s formal announcement of her Senate candidacy. Indeed, members of the media had been prepped to expect an event with all the spontaneity of a dental checkup.

Nobody expected much from Hillary Clinton’s formal announcement of

her Senate candidacy. Indeed, members of the media had been prepped to

expect an event with all the spontaneity of a dental checkup.



But with the nation looking on via CNN and C-SPAN, the carefully

choreographed announcement devolved into a PR nightmare.



Linda Bloodworth-Thomason, the TV producer and Friend of Hillary who

produced the 18-minute bio that preceded the candidate’s appearance,

chose Billy Joel’s Greatest Hits to entertain the crowd between the

short film and Hillary’s arrival. Unfortunately, nobody noticed that the

disc’s second track, ’Captain Jack,’ boasts saltier language than most

of Joel’s oeuvre.



’Your sister’s gone out, she’s on a date/And you just sit at home and

masturbate,’ the speakers blared, as former Hillary press secretary Neel

Lattimore pitched a conniption fit backstage. ’So you play your albums

and you smoke your pot/And you meet your girlfriend in the parking

lot ...



Captain Jack will get you high tonight,’ the song continued.



’This is not the message we wanted to convey on our big day,’ said a

source inside the Clinton camp. ’The campaign offers its sincerest (sic)

apology for the mistake. The First Lady does not endorse the message in

the Billy Joel song.’



Alas, during the speech that followed, Hillary asked, ’How do we protect

our children from the forces of popular culture?’



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